What is wrong with men? Not all men of course... just the ones I come into contact with.
I mean seriously. What kind of guy talks to you all night, gives you his business card and asks to spend time with you next time he's in town, only to have a long time girlfriend back home?
It seems this is the time of my life in which all of my friends converge on me and decide to all get engaged, get married and have babies. This not only leaves me exhausted and broke, but wondering when I will find someone I can bring to a wedding, none the less actually marry.
A few weeks ago I was at one of my friend's weddings. We don't know each other very well, but they're a lovely couple, I had Shabbat dinner at their place a few times and that garnered me an invite to the wedding. It was a lovely Jewish wedding in the heart of San Diego. (I know - San Diego again.)
So I drove down... by myself and went to the wedding... by myself. I did not know a single soul (no I'm not feeling sorry for myself, not yet anyway). I sat through the ceremony, (by myself) and
Mazal Tov!
ate at the reception (by myself.) Well ok, I was not actually at a table all by myself, that would be too miserable. I sat with two of the bride's cousins and their husbands. Halfway through the east-meets-west shrimp and grits appetizer (which I did not eat) another of the bride's cousins comes over to the table to sit by me.
"Oh, you're kosher?" I'm asked, when I pass over the shrimp. When I nod they tell me how difficult it is to keep kosher and how they can't be bothered to do so.
And then I start noticing... him. One of the male cousins. He is by himself. He starts talking to the husbands at the table as I nibble on the cheese tray that was just set down before me. I love weddings, I really do, but they can be overwhelming when you're by yourself. I keep to myself most of the night, chat a bit with the cousins, etc. By the time dinner is over, people are up and about mingling and talking. I stay at the table and so does the male cousin. He just sits there, looking adorable.
"Having fun?" he asks me.
I nod, "I love the milkshake shooters," I coyly respond.
Next thing you know the two of us are in full discussion mode. He's an architect with his own firm, he lives in Georgia, and he loves basketball and music (so far so good). He's Jewish, (not really religious, but I can fix that.) He's taller than me and has a nice head of hair; he's got a beard coming in, and he is very much the southern gentleman.
After we'd been talking for a bit, the cake-cutting was announced and he escorted me outside to watch. We both grab some cake and talk some more, this time about global warming and green energy, it's all very fascinating. But I can't help thinking to myself, why does he have to live in Georgia?
I ask myself a question I already know the answer to - Could I see myself living in Georgia one day?
Heck no.
If there is one thing in life that I am absolutely sure about, it's the fact that I will never in my life ever go back to Georgia, I was there for one day a few years ago. It was the WORST POSSIBLE EXPERIENCE of my life, and oh wow... the humidity!
I snap back to reality.
We're standing on the balcony, Micah and I. The conversation's still flowing. It's not even a little bit awkward. He's really nice, and funny, and handsome. I seriously feel like I'm in some disillusioned Disney movie, and I like it!
I'm not asking for much!
I want to get to know him better...
"It's a shame, really" I sigh.
"What?" He asks.
"That you live so far away."
"Well, I'll be out here in a few months for another cousins wedding. Maybe we could see each other then?" He smiles. "Maybe you could show me around?"
Oh, I like him a LOT!
"I would really like that."
And just like a fairy tale, the clock strikes midnight. They announce that the married couple is headed off to their honeymoon and everyone rushes out to say goodbye.
"Well I have an early flight," Micah tells me, "I have to get going soon."
"Can we keep in touch?" I ask.
"Of course we can!" He hands me his business card. We say goodnight and make our separate exits.
The next night I arrive back home, and I log onto my Facebook. (Dun, dun, dun.)
I enter his name and e-mail. His profile pops up. I add him as a friend.
I notice his info box and take a look. It's just your typical info: Hometown, Siblings, In a relationship with...
WHAT?!
He has a girlfriend!
So many things fly through my head at that moment, including words I can't type here. What is wrong with men?!?!?! I just don't understand! I do a little research, or stalking, (whichever you prefer.) And they look like a pretty happy couple. Nice Photos. Lovey-dovey comments back and forth. Oy.
Typical results.
I text Natasha and ask her opinion. Was I reading too much into the nights conversations and exchange of information, and invite to show him around???
I ask how she would react if Johnny ever did those things to another woman. You know, if he spent most of his time at a wedding alone with a hot girl, talking, laughing, and then gave her his business card asking to be shown around next time he's in town.
"Well I wouldn't have a problem with anything, except for the invite to spend time together next time he visits. That's not cool." She tells me.
"Maybe he has a booty call in every state and he is looking for one here?" Johnny interjects in the background.
"Thank you. Thank you so much Johnny." I respond. "I am nobody's booty call thank you very much."
Johnny knows I'm appalled at the thought, "Sometimes that's how guys are." He comfortingly replies.
Well Micah accepted my friend request and I deleted him the next day.
I don't know the reasoning behind his motives and I don't know if I was reading too much into the whole nights events, but I do know I hate getting my hopes up.
So that was my 'fairy tale.' I knew they weren't real.
On a 'brighter' note, I've been talking to a new guy on jDate. He seems nice. But... I know after all my wonderful jDate dates that I need to be wary even if someone seems nice. But come on, how bad can a guy who watches movies with his grandma be? Maybe we'll meet for drinks this week. I'll let you know!
